Today’s guest, Darnita Young, helps women visualize and effectuate a better future through vision boarding and goal setting. As she works with women, she not only helps them realize their dreams, but holds them accountable to continue down their desired path.
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April Grant 0:05
Welcome to the other side of 40 My name is April grant and I’m here to help women make positive changes with their lives after the age of 40. Let the other side of 40 become your community to find inspiration and support to start the next chapter of your life.
Today, we welcome Darnita young. She is a busy wife, mother, vision mentor and owner of prey enterprises LLC. Her mission is to encourage, empower and equip busy women with tools that will catapult their lives to the next level. She is passionate about sharing the love of Christ, giving practical tips to see God in a greater way. As Seen on her blog. The pleading mom and helping Christian entrepreneurs walk in the vision that God has for their business. Their Nita is currently working on starting a nonprofit organization, pleading mom plead no more to help women with resources after divorce in traumatic life experiences to eliminate depression, anxiety and financial destruction. Hey, welcome. Today we have Dr. Nita young. And she is a mom boss. She works and she has built her business as a mom that also has a daughter that studies at home. Can you tell us a little bit more about your journey? What got you to your what kind of business you you’re in? How did you get to where you are right now? Absolutely, um, years ago, I say years ago, but I’m just probably about three and a half years ago, I was working for a company, my background a little bit about my background. I am a licensed cosmetologist. And so that’s pretty much it, like I’m a licensed cosmetologist, but in my field, I’ve had the amazing opportunity to be in leadership, for probably I was in leadership for for probably about 13 years out of the 1516 years that I was, I was licensed. And so I’ve had the amazing opportunity to grow businesses to large salons to work as an instructor to work as a school director. So that I can, you know, enroll students and encourage them on their, on their journey, and even to be able to be a district leader of salons and businesses and grow their businesses and launch their businesses, which is really a great opportunity. So about three years ago, I had the amazing opportunity to work for a company that was that was really growing. And it really opened up my eyes on how to grow businesses in a different different way. Because they had intensive training, they trained you as if it wasn’t a franchise, so they had to train every district leader as if your salons were your franchise. And so I completely had to run them as into you know, as as a business and it was great education. But what happens is, I went through a divorce, and, um, my world kind of crumbled. Long story short, I had to take a different position. Right. And I slowly dwindled away from my career in the cosmetology industry. And it was heartbreaking for me because I had two little children, I became a single a single mom, and it was difficult, I couldn’t work the hours, I couldn’t travel the out, you know, travel, like I used to. And so, um, I had to step down, it was suggested that I did that. So, um, I was heartbroken in several, you know, in several ways, because, yeah, you know, I was I had already failed in my marriage and I felt would not fail
in your marriage, but we got
to where I want to build at that time. Okay. All right.
Fast forward, okay. This is how I felt during that time. Like, there was really, you know, um, I wasn’t living the life at that point, as I was getting ready to transition into my 40s I was that I did not have the life that I that I felt like I should have had, that I should had, and I was working as a manager and as a stylist, and I just was like, in a place and I was like, ooh, no one, like, you know, right, right. And, um, and so I’m so fat to fast food. Word, I ended up getting remarried, you know, I, I ended up getting remarried to my ex husband. Okay, crazy, that’s a whole nother, that’s a whole nother story, but
you’re not alone out there.
Right, we got remarried, um, you know, a few, a few years later. And, um, he, you know, he has his own business. And so I started helping him with his business. And I’m in transition. And my daughter, she went through some bullying and different things like that. So this home mom world was like, really surrounding me in a sense, because, of course, I’ve been a mom, I have a 22 year old is my, my 22 year old daughter. So I’ve been a mom for a long time. But I had to be honest, like, I never had to be like, 100% all day mom, like, right? I’ve never I don’t know, I don’t know if that makes sense. But so, um, my I was we transition my daughter, because we moved from Minnesota to Jacksonville, transition her from being, um, you know, in public school. So homeschool. I went from working, you know, all the time to stay to stay in home. And then I also have a five year old, which then he was about three, you know, and so I was full time mom. And I remember, and it was fine. You know, it’s like, I’ve never been a stay at home mom before. Um, I’m not domestic. So, I mean, like, I know, a lot of my friends that, that stay home. And, um, you know, they cook and they clean and like, this is their livelihood. And I just was not grasping that, like, I just could not like my mind won’t wrap around that concept of staying busy around the house, right? No, I even No, not at all, though. There’s plenty, there’s plenty to do. Just like, like, I was going crazy. I’m not even I was going crazy. And so because I had a huge transition, I was really trying to, to settle myself, like you’ve never had the opportunity to really stay home and be intentional and spend time with your kids either. And so you know, you know, try to wrap your mind around that. I remember sitting in church one Sunday. And our pastor was just talking about, um, being on assignment and being intentional about the season that you’re in. And I was sitting there listening, like, Okay, so what’s going on in this season of my life? How can I be more intentional, and he started, you know, saying it no matter what your job is, if you’re a stay at home, Mom, if you’re this if you’re if you’re that really be intentional, you know, in, in your assignment in this season. So I went home and I’m like, okay, God, what should I be doing? You know, like, what is it that I should be doing? And it’s not I was not ready to hear, like, wash the dishes? Because that, no, not gonna call on my life, right? No, seriously. I mean, I fight that into this day that I am not domesticated. And I don’t want to do the housework if I don’t have to. So work 40 hours a week, I told my daughter even just last night, I said, I don’t know about the whole past lives and all that. But I do know that in a life, a life that’s not my own right now. I was a queen or something like people were like, like, draw me back. And, you know, waving feathers, me like I was, I know, I was a queen somewhere. Because this life that I have, it’s like, I’m waiting on my servants to come in, you know, lift me up and carry me around, you know, that’s not happening. So it’s got to watch some time. But so what happened is I kind of started digging into, you know, what God has for me, you know, and that in a season of, of, you know, like, even right now, like, we have a season of stillness, in a sense, a season where, where we, we can’t call ourselves and, and find some peace if we, if we try it, you know, really hard to, even in my house when there’s so many people now, you know, it is hard to find quiet, although we don’t have to really go any anywhere. It’s like, even though I’m at home, it’s it’s a little harder to find peace, you know. And so I had to really get to a place where, you know, I had to find peace and really just, you know, ask God, what is it that you have for me in this season of my life. And so I felt really encouraged to start you know, praying more often, where myself start praying more often with my kids, kind of teaching them prayer and just things that I that I felt like I was doing, but I wasn’t intentional with doing it so fast forward. Because when I started digging into those different ways of, you know, kind of leading, leaving my family on the assignment in the season of being a stay at home, mom
I published a prayer journal. And it was really in the, really, the, everything that I learned during the, the, you know, the assignment of teaching of teaching my kids, and, um, you know, me being steel, and in Sydney and prayer and all those things, I have published a prayer journal. And so I was like, okay, and it wasn’t like overnight, it took, it took a while, and it was very perfectly thought out. But I was thinking like, God, like, I can do this. And before that, actually, I’m sorry, I skipped the part, I started blogging. And so I started, I started blogging, I started a blog, because what happened is because I’m not domesticated, let’s just say domesticated. I wanted to help, I wanted to help busy moms be able to function as a normal, a normal mom, but really be able to see God she because I think it’s important, you know, like, to just really to have faith and to really kind of know our source and, you know, from for me as she’s described, but so to really be able to help moms in the same situation that I am, like, we’re still moms, we still need quiet, just quiet time. And even in that fire time, if you just if you read a book, you know, if you pray or whatever it is that you that you do in that, that quiet time, have some quiet time has some peace, um, if you’re looking for ways to you know, to pray in five minutes, just different things like that. So that’s why I started the blog because I wanted to be able to share my faith. But I also wanted, you know, women to know like, Listen, you’re not in this by you’re not in this by yourself. And so that grew into me wanting to create the the prayer journal. So I created the prayer journal. And from there,
I didn’t even have your prayer journal.
Pray in the midst of the hustle,
pray in the midst of a hustle.
Oh, and the hustle. Yeah. Yeah. So you know, so it’s just really encouraging us to pray, even though, you know, we’re hustling and bustling as moms and entrepreneurs and wives, and you know, all the things that we have to do in this life. Like we still, we still have to stop, get us some peace. However, you know, we we find peace and for me is through prayer. And so, um, I published a prayer journal, and I was, you know, so excited. And I and I was so excited, because I’ve never done anything like that. Like I said, like, I will say, I was a cosmetologist, and I was growing businesses and things like that. But like, I didn’t think that I could, like, you know, create a prayer journal. And the prayer journal within itself is, it’s not a guided journal, but it guides you on how to, to pray daily, how to encourage engaging scripture, just different ways to do that in a timely fashion. Right? If you have five minutes, then you know, you said you said daily prayer, you say affirmations, you pray for your family, and you pray for others. And if you have more time, you know, you dig into scriptures in the Bible studies and things like that. And so I created that, because that’s what I was doing during my you know, I was a downtime, because it wasn’t out during my mom time, right? My time of staying at home. But I wanted to be able to share that with others. And that’s what I am. That’s what I did. But because of that, and because of my blog, like, I just feel like the doors open for me to do so many other things. And so I started doing vision board workshops, a lot of it came together, because during the time that I was creating my prayer journal, I was also vision boarding. And so as a result of, of prayer and vision, I started doing vision board parties. And let me tell you, a lot of times, like when we when our mind starts to open up with different opportunities. If I for one God, like how does this go together? Hey, it’s April here, we had some technical difficulties. And when I put it back together, I noticed that there was some overlap, from the first part of the conversation to the second part of the conversation, I’d appreciate if you just accept it, and move along with it with grace. And here we will continue. Okay, so in the midst of me doing, you know, my prayer journal and my blog, I was also vision boarding. And I have put on my vision board that I was going to create a book and I was gonna, you know, start a blog and create a book, and all this kind of stuff, right, you know, people put stuff on their vision board that they want, you know, that’s what I so. Yeah, that’s the whole point. But when I started actually started my blog, and then I actually did publish a book. I was like, well, this is kind of creepy. You know, I know that God honors vision and you know, and all these things, but for me, I mean, like, I literally was like, I have no Never know anything like this in my life. I’ve never like, been so intentional, I will say about things in my life. Because even with my jobs, somebody had given me things to do. So even though I was independent on growing, you know, the business, but they told me what to do, they gave me ways to grow it. And I expanded on that I knew what I needed to do. But in this journey of me blogging and publishing a book, like I don’t, you know, it’s like me praying and saying, okay, I don’t, I don’t really know what to do next. I’ve never done anything like this before. And so when I created a vision board, and I’ve seen those things come in the past, I was like, What do you know, many words, you know, and I started digging into it, and really long into more about it as I started having vision board parties. When I tell you,
I’ve done I just, I don’t know, it just is crazy. When you when you are in a place where you’re doing what you’re supposed to do. Things happen. I mean, I will, you know, I go into a room and I’m, and I’m talking to people about vision, and we’re creating vision boards. And, you know, people are so excited about their future, because they literally put pictures on a piece of paper and, and the parties that I the parties that I have, um, they’re not just us looking at the pictures, we’re creating a plan, we’re goal setting, we’re really, you know, digging into goals and, and what you want your future to look like, but you know, so there’s other aspects around paid. But at the end of the day, when they’re holding whatever they have the board or, you know, and all the pictures is like the excitement that they have for their future. It’s like, priceless, it’s priceless. And, and because I’ve been there, I’m like, Oh my gosh, I know how you feel, you know? And so I started having a vision board party. And you’re gonna ask the question, because I could talk forever. I was just going to say, so how did that roll into an actual business for you. So, um, so with the prayer with the prayer journals, and the, the, so I have my blog, and when my prayer journals, like, I sell t shirts, and I’m actually going to have a full blown, let’s cross our fingers. by the middle of next month, I’ll have a full blown, what I call beautique. And it’s going to be, um, I’m going to sell products that inspire women, through, you know, through Scripture and quotes, and, you know, also my prayer journal, I have a couple of books and T shirts, and different things like that. So that is the part of a part of my business. And then I also have print create events, which is my vision board parties, and kind of the vision, like, the painting parties. So I’ll have different I have different events like that, like, where I even do, you know, birthday parties and go to people and things like that. So praying create events is, is really the events where we come and we put our vision on paper. And so it can be through painting, it can be through my actual vision board, where we put in, you know, pictures and, and things on on the paper, but it’s just really putting your vision, your vision to the paper. And, and I and I had that amazing opportunity, which like I said, like when you are starting to do things, and it opens the door for me to be a vision mentor. And so I have been and this is the the I’m, I’m continuing strategies to kind of see how far I want to go with with being a mentor. Okay, um, because when I, when I’ve helped people, I was just helping people because I was helping them after the vision board parties, you know, so they, they had amazing visions, and like, how do I get to this next step. And so I would kind of mentor them into that to that place, not knowing that that was like going to be an additional service that I provided. And so, vision mentoring is one of the things that I have been doing to really help. Mostly, I would say, Christian businesses, because I do encourage spiritual development. I believe that I’m, where I’m going even not even where I’m at, where I am going, I believe that God is guiding my journey. And that I’m because I believe in that I have to, I have to stay connected to him. And so I believe that spiritual spiritual development is important if that’s, if that’s what we believe, right? And so, there are a ton of Christian business owners who kind of believe that same thing, but need encouragement and spiritual development and growing versus God’s way. And so I have so much. I see I see. So in the vision board parties, do you update your vision board? When you do a new party? Do you update it and keep pushing yourself to the next vision? Well, yes. And so it’s so crazy. Because every time I go to a vision board party, I’m like, Oh, I love your vision, where is like, so, like, people are so creative. Let me tell them, like,
my kids will say, I get the most I’m so extra. Like, I think that I’m an extra, I don’t have my, oh, I don’t have it in front of me. But my, you know, my prayer journal has a vision board in the back of it. And I have like, all these little frilly stuff hanging out of it, and, you know, all of that. But yes, like, I get so many ideas to even expand my vision even even more. And so, like I do, like I said, My prayer journal has a vision board in the back of it. So like, I can always add stuff to that post, my big one, my big one is up on my wall. And so I don’t take you down and put it back up, my husband will have to do that. And I know, he’s like, Oh, my gosh, what are you doing? I leave, right, write it up on the wall. And then, you know, I can adjust the one that I had in my journal, but it most definitely, like, I always get ideas. And I’m just different, like different things. Like I’ve done a vision board at a conference, which that was, like, I didn’t even, like, see myself doing anything like that. It was actually a book, like a Christian book publishing conference, and I was going to be a to classes there. And I ended it with the, with the vision with the vision board workshop, and encourage writers to write you know, and use their vision board as a tool to get them to, to finish in that, you know, finishing that book, and really opening up the doors to the other other things that they want. And vision is so important. I mean, I think, I know, everybody’s heard that, that people perish for a lack of knowledge or lack of vision. And, you know, when, when they’re when someone doesn’t have have vision, it’s almost like they’re hopeless, like, they have nothing to look forward to. And it is so sad when I when I see people, and they don’t even know what their next steps in life is, like, they’re just living, like, I’m just going to work every day, you know, but you know, and we don’t want to be so consumed by, you know, what I’m doing next year, and what I’m doing, you know what I mean? Like, we don’t want to be consumed by that. But we need expectation, I don’t have expectation. I think, definitely one of the things that helps people thrive. Because when they set forth their expectations, they have a goal, they have something to work towards, to and they have something to look forward to. They have that and awakens their spirit to take that next step. And when you don’t have it, I think it becomes hard. Because if you don’t know what your next step is, or you don’t know which direction to even go, then you don’t really have any motivation to do anything. And I mean, vision boarding is I’ve got actually two in here. So as you talk about vision boards, I got one really big one I did at an event. And actually, I think I’m going to combine the two probably in the next couple weeks. But you know, I always find it, enlightening to do it. And I always separate mine. So I have kind of categories between faith this family finance, you see, I like I like alliteration, so I hope to everything in a literate bucket pattern. And, and I separated because different goals are in different areas of your life. So I want to make sure like I have a strong family between my marriage and between being a mother and then I have money like where do I want to go and it helps the vision part of it the board part of it helps you hone in and remember what your goals are. So that’s why one of the reasons I have mine up in my bedroom, because when I wake up I can look at it yep, every single day I can look at it I just glance over and I’m like oh yeah, that’s what I’m working towards.
that’s a constant reminder to just keep going so everything you think you’re gonna go Oh, girl that’s a loaded question
Darnita Young 24:39
it’s so um my business is the Oh my business is actually a pray enterprises LLC. Okay um it’s under pray enterprises is pleading mom which is my which is my blog. And that’s where I have my shop. As of right now but I’m cleaning mom is going to be going into A nonprofit organization. Okay, and so, um, that’s what my, my intentions on when this quarantine is over, to be able to come out of it and saying that I’m at least in the beginning, you know, like, processes of having the the nonprofit started when I was going through my divorce and because I work with with so many women, I was really in a bad place like I was depressed and I had, I went through therapy and counseling in my church, and I stayed in prayer, and I’ve, and that’s how I feel like I got through it. But me going through therapy and things like that, that really helped me. But those are the, you know, the personal things that a lot of women go through that they don’t want to talk about, and not even just with divorce, um, just, you know, postpartum depression, just as, like, we get depressed, so easy, because we have so many things on our plate. And a lot of times, we don’t know how to express our feelings, or we don’t have help, and it’s just so many things. And so a piece of it was, was my emotional, um, my emotional imbalance and imbalances I would say, but I had a lot of issues emotionally. And then I had a very difficult time financially, I had found my divorce by myself, like I didn’t have any, like, I didn’t have a support system, because like I said, I had moved here from Minnesota to Jacksonville. So I didn’t know a lot of people, and my church supporting me as much as I could. But there are so many like that. And that’s just a little part of my my story. But, um, there were, there are so many women that I mentor, and just just volunteer and, you know, mentoring, that are going through that and so much more. And I want to give them an outlet, I mean, like I would love like, I have a huge vision for it. Um, and I’m still you know, researching, but I would love for the, for me to be able to help women financially to be able to, you know, pay for childcare, or not able to, you know, have be able to have a lawyer to be able to help them through their divorce. Because a lot of women, if they’re in a position to where they were stay at home moms, they are, even if they if they work, sometimes they work, it’s almost worse, because, um, you know, and I’m not bashing men or anything like that. But a lot of times the men, if the women didn’t make as much money, the man can afford a lawyer, or when you know, the women are, aren’t able to afford a lawyer and they just kind of get the short end of the stick. And I’m not about the battle and in the fight in but I believe in being fair. And a lot of times, if we don’t have the funding, and the finances to be able to help us, we just get the short end of the stick. And so and not just in the divorce piece of it, but just having a support system, to be able to help, you know, to be able, I would love to have like a childcare where these women can go and you know, and take their kids during this time, because I’m telling you, I have because I had to step down from the position that I that I had, I was working so many hours, like my kids were going from from date one day care that was open in the daytime to a daycare that was open at night, I was paying so much money, like I was paying my rent, for childcare. And it was it was difficult. And it was in the transition period where you know, like, um, you don’t get Child Support yet because you’re not even divorced. Like it was like, right, right. And, you know, I don’t even know what I would get, you know, with child support, or am I gonna get shot, you know, and so, so many women go through that. And what happens is, you lose yourself, you lose your job, you you’re not I mean, like a lot of women have to go through a process of starting over. And I want to help eliminate women from from going through that if I don’t even know like, if it’s just me, calling them praying for them, babysitting their kids, helping them find a lawyer that you know, is willing to even give them a discount. I don’t know. You know, I don’t know what it all looks like right now. But that is my vision for for cleaning mom. My man preview peak is where I am transitioning my my beauty, my beauty to where I have my book, like I have my prayer journal, I actually published a book, I’m in a collaboration called unshakable faith. And, and that book is talks about, you know, my divorce and what I did during that divorce and kind of getting, you know, the help that I got and transition into to, you know, us being remarried and then I’m also in another book collaboration that I’m it’s a devotional though, so my fingers are crossed that it’ll be released in about a month. So that’s a devotional to help um, too. Help, you know just women when they’re going through difficult times. And so all of those will be in my shop plus t shirts and jewelry. Um, and just different different pieces
April Grant 30:14
will be in my my boutique. And then my vision mentor and services. So along with my my, you know my vision mentor services and vision board parties, you’re praying create events. So it’s a lot, I’m putting it
That’s how this currency is going to all come is going to all come together but it’s a huge vision and I’m really excited. I’m really excited about it. I’m going to really just go with you know, just just continue to, to go with it because I just see it being something really, really big. Awesome. So I think we’re almost done. So do you want to tell us where we can find you online? Absolutely. I’m literally everywhere you can you can check out my blog at cleaning mom calm that’s ELDING mo m so plida mom calm. Just check out the inspiration. Just subscribe to the subscribe to the blog or the newsletter. I even have a area on there where my daughter blogs my 20 year old so Oh nice. Okay, she What is she talking about? People? Yeah, she has like a she has a devotional she’s doing like a seven week devotional on what is love and talking about God’s love in different different ways. So it’s really cool to see her her. Her look, you know her outtake on all that. So and then I am on Facebook at pleading Mom, I am on Instagram at cleaning mom and I’m also on Instagram at trade beautique and Twitter. I pleaded mom, so I’m I’m everywhere. So if you find look for cleaning mom, you’ll find me. All right. And don’t worry, I’ll put this all in the show notes so people will be able to see and click on it and figure out exactly where they are, where you are. And thank you so much for coming by and interviewing with me and it’s wonderful. I really appreciate you
know, thank you for the opportunity.
Transcribed by https://otter.ai